Cruel Intentions

Do you ever feel like maybe you're becoming a bad person? Or a person who makes poor choices, does mean things to people who are potentially good?

I use to think there were two types of people, that you were either good or bad. Without a doubt I would have called myself a good person, strong morals and values, honest, hardworking. Lately things seem a little blurred. It's not about being good or bad because there are definitely shades of gray. I don't want to hurt anyone. Is it wrong to make decisions based on your own selfish interests, even though it might directly hurt someone else? Not someone you love just someone else, someone potentially good, better than you. I want to be good, but sometimes it feels good to be bad.

The bad guys always get screwed, and I don't mean good vs. bad guy in a conventional sense. I mean the selfish, gray characters. For example, Anne just wanted to be Queen and lost her head, Scarlett wanted Ashley and lost Rhett, Lady Macbeth could never get the blood stains off her hands, and Kathryn just wanted to have sex with her brother, but got busted for a coke addiction. Great characters, successful women, selfish, and ruined. They put up such an admirable fight to get what they want, and get so close, but ultimately they don't deserve it. I always find myself rooting for these characters, and maybe its because on a level I can relate. It scares me, to be driven and not succeed, but perhaps, what scares me more is to push too hard and succeed by non-honourable means. I would never do anything to jeopardize what I have worked for, but doing even little hurtful things can spiral you into becoming a person you never thought you could be. All because of simple, cruel intentions.

-C